The most painful situation of powerlessness is when a loved person, (Which should include everyone) refuses to listen. You have tried to live in 2 Timothy 2:22-26, relating to them in meekness, living a life fleeing lust and following righteousness, faith, love, peace. Doing all this with the support of the brethren at church. Watching your attitude and intentions to be for the other’s blessing and not for your comfort or control. However, they still have attitudes and won’t listen or change. They look to start arguments and quarrel.
First, you must thank God that without him you can control no one. John 1:55 Ask him to show you what your part is, and ask for strength to do your part.
Then, having done your part: (More from 2 Timothy 2).
You must avoid being sucked into arguments that they try to start. You must not fight with them on anything, but be gentle and patient and only sharing your thoughts if they genuinely want to learn what you believe. Then, in meekness, instruct them, letting them know that the Holy Spirit has shown you your own need to grow.
But even then people often won’t change. It is then OK to set limits that take into account your own weakness, since they have learned to poke the right buttons.
Now the Holy Spirit can work and it is good for you to ask him to do so and not complain if the consequences spill over onto you.
Ask him to bring trials into their life.1 Corinthians 5:5
Ask him to block the temporary pleasures of their sin. Hebrews 11:25
Ask him to stir up their support people to confront them on their need to change. 1 Corinthians 5:13
Ask him to convict them that the problem is their own responses and that not everyone else needs to change. Acts 26:18, Isaiah 29:18, Luke 4:18
Be prepared to minister into their needs when the Holy Spirit starts to work. Do not rejoice in their trouble when they stumble. Proverbs 24:17
I had a patient who started to pray this way for her husband. As a result, he was soon out of work as a contractor. She was not sure if she wanted to continue because they could lose their house. I said, “Let us pray, dear Lord, her husband could go to hell for all eternity, but she could lose her house, and she is not sure if she wants you to keep working!” “Stop, stop she cried, let’s let the Lord continue”. (He got saved, and she did not lose her house, and her loving support in the crisis was the key that let the Spirit act.)
